Thank you for your interest in this course. Better stated: I appreciate your interest in this course. It feels so good to create and share. I love that you are curious about my course.

Love and appreciation go hand in hand. Do you agree? If not, please keep reading.

I introduced three skills in the first course: recognizing resistance, on board thinking, and choosing curiosity.

If you are somewhat confused, or conflicted, as to how I have presented love as an energetic state that exists, then consider practicing the skills taught in the original self-care course: 

• Recognize resistance. -  this is a life skill. This is a game changer. To recognize is to have an awareness. Self-awareness is the marquee skill for all personal growth programs that desire sustainable, growth outcomes. What are sustainable growth outcomes? Sustainable growth outcomes are outcomes that produce results that contribute to one’s evolution of their life experience. Growth outcomes are observable. And best of all, the outcomes can sustain themselves. I suppose an example of this would be weight loss. Losing weight and gaining it back suggests that the applied skills, tools, and strategies to promote weight loss were effective and got results, but the results were not sustainable. In life, and in our school setting as mental health providers, we want to facilitate skill sets that lead to sustainable growth outcomes.

• On Board thinking. - this is a life skill. Energy. When I mention energy you may be totally connected and interested because you ‘feel’ the world and interpret situations, circumstances, and events through an energetic, felt experience. If the word ‘energy’ creates some confusion or hesitation - you are noticing resistance. Awesome job noticing. On Board thinking is what happens after you notice, or recognize, resistance. On Board thinking is simply validating the resistance: ‘I am not in agreement'...'I need more understanding'...'This doesn’t make sense'...etc’ - and then choosing to stay open by asking yourself, ‘what can I get on board with?’ For example, I do not have children that I birthed into this world and am responsible for their upbringing. I work with children, and have done so my entire adult life. I am curious about present day student's brains and how they were born with an innate level of intelligence to adapt to the digital landscape - the landscape that they were born in to. I often suggest that adults have a lot to learn from children. Let’s say that you have resistance to that statement. So using the skills, you can validate your resistance by stating to yourself, ‘I am not open to considering that my child has a higher level of intelligence than I do - that’s weird. But I can get on board with being curious about how their brain is wired to adapt to digital technology. That’s an interesting thought.’

• (when possible) Choose Curious. - this is a life skill. Curious is the Panama Canal that allows energy to move from a resistant, or closed state, into an open state. Resistance is to Groundhog Day as Curious is to the Panama Canal. Curious is when we open up the flow of energy to possibility. I add the ‘when possible’ because it isn’t always possible. Feelings are feelings. It’s not about there being good or bad, right or wrong. The self-care is in the caring about yourself enough to notice (self-awareness) limiting patterns that don’t lead to sustainable growth outcomes. A state of curiosity allows one to ask questions. Questions allow for answers. When our energy is in a open state, it’s flowing (we access our higher order thinking, and tap into executive functions) and we recognize our power to choose. I can choose the story I tell. This is where practicing the frame, that was introduced in the original self-care course comes in handy. 

Play with these skills in your day-to-day. Recognizing resistance is practicing self-awareness. Resistance shuts us down. If you feel stuck or spinning in some version of ‘same’, open up to new outcomes by using onboard thinking as a means of allowing the resistance to pass. Resistance keeps you in lower brain functioning, we don’t access our problem solving, or our executive functions, when we get stuck or spin in resistance. Once you have these skills somewhat mastered, use the other brainstorm strategies taught in self-care to create new outcomes. If you don’t have an end in mind, it’s that much easier to get stuck or spin in same - you haven’t painted a new picture of what you prefer. You certainly have a preference, otherwise your wouldn’t of had resistance - there is a way you prefer things to be. (when possible) Choose curious. Why do you want it to be different? And then what? If you can answer these two questions in a way that supports a sense or state of well-being then you are on the right track. Life happens for us, not to us. It is on our side. Promise.